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Even More Real life screwups! 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 |Pg 1 | Pg 2 | Pg 4 | Pg 5 | Pg 6 | Pg 7 | Pg 8 | Pg 9 | Top of page 1) At my old customer service job, we had headsets and microphones - you know, like the sham wow! guy... Anyway, we had mute buttons on the phone, and I was quick with hitting it because a lot of times insults were halfway out my mouth as my fleet finger was screaming toward the mute button. Over time I noticed people simply putting their fingers over their mouth pieces and I thought, "This is great, it will totally save me the extra step of hitting the mute button on the phone which is like 10 inches further than my mic." So, I plug up the mic with my finger and say to the person next to me, "This customer is an idiot." Little did I know, putting ones finger on the mic merely muffled what was said, and didn't actually MUTE it. So the customer says in my ear, "I can still hear you." D Top of page2) There was this one dude at school that NOBODY and I mean NOBODY likes. He's the big mouth type. Well anyways there's some kid that looks exactly like him and that guy is one of my best friends. So, the friendless pupil really got on everyone's nerves that day. He started criticizing different ethnicities and what not. So I just got really mad when my heritage was brought up. And me and him aren't exactly friends. He started to realized it bothered me and he wouldn't shut up. So I just left the area. People started telling me that he took it to another level when he mentioned how unsanitary my ethnicity was. I literally stormed out to the lunch area in search of the no brained idiot. I finally spotted the back of his head. I punched the back of it so hard he screamed. Luckily almost no one was there. I was about start laughing until I realized he was my best friend. Oh crap. I felt so bad I ran over to him and gave him the biggest hug I ever gave anyone. I decided not to go search for him after all. Me and him are still friends, but every time he sees the no brain idiot he always says under his breath "Thanks a lot." Then smacks me in the head. Lol Sabrina 3) I was 12 years old at the time and decided I wanted something to eat before I went to my friend's party. My parents were busy like always and I knew I was going to have to fix myself something to eat. Suddenly, I saw a big purple/red fruit. Pomegranate! I had learned about the fruit in class and knew that it would stain your clothes if you spilled it on yourself. I also knew it was a delicious fruit full of antioxidants. I got a knife and cut it open because I didn't know any other way to open it. All of a sudden, I had purple juice on my new, white dress! I was so angry; I could have thrown the fruit at the wall. I went outside because the pomegranate was dripping and then my dog, Nacho, came running up to me, and of course it got on his fur. His fur was sort of a creamy color and so it noticed a lot. I knew I was going to have to clean it off him somehow because my mom would get furious if she saw her precious poodle with purple hair. I took Nacho inside and brought him to the bathroom. Nacho hated taking baths like most dogs, so I knew I was going to have to be very slick. I put him inside the bathtub and got a cup of water to clean him with. I poured it over the stain and scrubbed it with a sponge. It wasn't noticeable anymore so I decided my work there was done. I stood up and then Nacho had the nerve to shake off his wet body. Water started flying at me so I yelled at Nacho and told him to get out. He scrammed out the door and into the backyard. I wasn't soaking wet, but I smelled like a dog throughout the party. Nancy Top of page4) Normally when you buy something at the store - you get a receipt. Well, at my current job, one of my functions is to make sure party A pays party B by collecting a receipt from party A. However, one fateful day I forgot to do that and shipped them their goods. Unfortunately, party A claimed the goods were "defective" and decided not to pay for them. Total cost to the company I work for? $11,000 Now that is a screwup! Martin Top of page5) The Most Embarrassing Game Of My Life It all started when I rushed to get dressed for my game.
I was throwing my cloths everywhere in the locker room. Bianca 6) When I was at my friends house sleeping over we decided to go outside and play. She has three so we started playing with them, but we became bored so we decided to go on the slide. While we were going to the slide I somehow managed to step in a pile of the dog's poop. At the time I didn't notice and just kept on walking. We got to the top of the slide (which was in a huge fort that she had) and we smelled something really bad ( I still didn't know it was me.) We just forgot about the smell and kept on playing. My friend went down the slide and then it was my turn to go, so I went down the slide with my feet first not knowing that I was getting dog poop all over. When I came out of the bottom and turned around my friend started laughing at me so I asked her what she was laughing at and she said that I had dog poop all over my pants. I was sooooo embarrassed but my friend just went inside and told her mom. So her mom told me to take off my pants while she washed them so I did and was standing in the garage with a towel wrapped around my waist. Since it was taking a long time to clean my pants my friend decided to get me a pair of her jeans. My friend was super skinny so none of her jeans fit me. Her mom had to fix her jeans till they fit me while I waited for them to dry. Later when my friend and I went back to her fort we noticed that you could see my foot marks on the wood with dog poop. We tried (unsuccessfully) to clean it off and to this day you can still see the marks. Olivia 7) My biggest screw up is getting really drunk and taking a walk around the neighborhood at my friends house. I got lost and they had to call the cops to find me...2 hours later. Jennifer 8) When I was in college, I was dating a guy who has an identical twin brother, I could ALWAYS tell them apart! But after a group of us went on a skiing trip for the weekend and a tad too much partying, my perception was a bit distorted. We had rented a Ski chalet, we were settling in for the night. I took a shower and bare butt I slipped into bed, well... what I thought was my boyfriend's bed in the room I thought we declared ours! It was only after I groped his privates he bellowed out "WTF"...which still echos in my head to this day! Needless to say the relationship didn't last much after that! Major Screw Up of my life! Heather 9) During my adolescence, as many children do I both wanted to feel I took more responsibility and as though I had some control over an automobile, presumably in preparation of attaining my driver's license once I'd turned 16. My mother gamely played along by allowing me frequently to put the car into gear before departing from where it had been parked. Unfortunately, I didn't fully grasp the fundamentals at play, and so one day, after a little league baseball game, I was in such good spirits I ran to the car and jumped in. Wanting to be helpful and have the car in gear before my mother had even gotten inside, I pulled the stick.. and immediately the car began to roll down the gentle slope toward where there was a small, steep dropoff into some wild grass and trees. One thing I had failed to take into account - besides the obvious, that with nobody to hold down the brake pedal the car wouldn't necessarily stay still once taken out of park - was that the doors on the car were set to automatically lock once put into gear. As my mother frantically rushed over and tried to pull open the door from the slowly-rolling car, I thought I was staying remarkably cool under the circumstances when I thought to pull the lever back into park. However I did truly begin to panic when it did nothing to slow my progress, especially as I began to gain velocity and come ever nearer to the drop and the suddenly horrifying visage of those vicious tree trunks. Pounding on the window, my mother shouted that I needed to apply the brake - and finally, with very little time to spare, her words cut through my terror and I dove onto the floor of the car to press the brake pedal with both hands. Shakily, I arose and unlocked the driver's side door for my mother. I wouldn't get to put the car into gear after that... Andrew 10) One of the most embarrassing things I have ever done happened in the second grade. It was Halloween, and I was stoked. I was my favorite character, woody the cowboy from Toy Story. I was walking through the halls showing off my cool costume all day. The teacher thought I looked really cool. Everything was going well until I dropped my pencil. This was an Epic Fail if I've ever seen one. As I reached for the pencil I heard a RIPPPPPPPP! and the next thing I remembered is that I had forgotten to put on underwear. This was the worse thing EVER! My nickname was the butt cowboy until the third grade. Life can be harsh. The Butt Cowboy
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