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And
Yet Even More Real life screwups!
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1)
“Back when i was nine years old, i would go over to my friends
house and i would ask him if his parents were home. When he told
me they werent i would say, "Lets do this!" We undressed
at least 40 barbies and turned up the techno. We called it The Naked
Dance Party. We heard a car pull up and they came down and saw us
dancing with 40 or so naked barbies with the techno roaring...we
still get teased today."
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2)
"I am no stranger to the act of screwing up. Ever since I
was but a wee child I’ve been falling down and scraping
my knees, saying things that I later regret, and just all around
acting in an embarrassing manner. One of my more memorable screw-ups
though happened when I was still in kindergarten…
I ran outside as quickly as I possibly could while trying
to simultaneously wiggle into my jacket and jam my shoes onto
my feet. Battling against the relentless wind, I stumbled through
the open garage door and regained my balance by leaning on the
bumpy beige surface of the freezer. Perched on top of the large
rectangle was the reason I braved such a gusty day: my red plastic
Mickey Mouse kite.
Excitedly, I stood on my tiptoes and grabbed the flimsy
flying device. I unwound the thin white string from the neon orange
plastic handle and thrust the kite out the door, hoping the wind
would catch it and send it soaring majestically into the sky.
For the first half of its two-second flight, the delicate
synthetic apparatus managed to fight valiantly against the fearsome
force of the wind. Onward my kite struggled against its invisible
foe, until finally it could endure no longer. Before my reflexes
could save me from what was about to happen, the plastic tube
of the kite’s frame had plunged into my unshielded eye.
I shrieked in pain as I flung my wind-battered kite
to the ground and rushed back into the house with my hands covering
my eye. As I lurched through the door, I somehow managed to recount
my tragic tale to my mother in a series of sobs. With soothing
words and an ice pack pressed gently against my teary eye, she
guided me into the car and took me to the hospital.
The doctor informed us that I had just scratched my
cornea, to which he prescribed a tube of thick, cloudy ointment
that I was to apply to my eye wound twice a day until the tube
was empty. Luckily, my eye healed quickly and I didn’t damage
my vision, but my view of carefree childhood playtimes became
clouded with the fear of another calamitous screw-up, thus prompting
my parents to force me to wear safety glasses from then on when
handling kites outside."
Sarah
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3) My Screw-Up Moment
"Once upon a time I decided to be a daredevil and
I jumped off my bed. As I jumped I realized it wasn't a good idea
because I saw my black lamp on the floor. I landed feet first
on the lamp and the bulb shattered and cut my feet open. I had
to crawl down the stairs because I couldn't walk and my mom had
to pull the pieces of glass that were stuck in my foot out. I
had a lot of band-aids on my feet and it hurt to walk for about
a week. I don't think I will ever be that stupid again and maybe
look at what's on the floor when I jump off things."
Brittany
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4)
"For my fifteenth birthday my mother and I decided to keep
it fairly simple, just all my best friends and a lot of pizza. We
decided to play a game of "Imagine If" so I ran upstairs
to get the game. As I came down the stairs I noticed my abnormally
long cat, Oliver, laying on one of the steps. To avoid disturbing
his highness I took one large step. Being the spastic cat he is,
he freaked and ran which caused me to lose my footing. I fell all
the way down the stairs on my back. I only made things worse by
trying to catch myself. I reached up and knocked over a huge glass
picture frame. Sitting in the dinning room my friends had a perfect
view of the steep wooden staircase and I could hear them in perfect
unison say ooooh then burst into laughter at the clumsiness that
was just like me."
Elizabeth
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5)
"It was a regular day in my house. Us kids were playing
our PlayStation laughing hysterically when we died or shot someone.
The T.V. was loud and our shrieks were high so it wasn't hard
to not hear what my mom was saying from the kitchen. I did
catch one word though.
Soup.
"Sure!" I shouted over the
roar of Star Wars Battlefront. Turning back to
the screen I saw my brother about to snipe me and concentrated
on the game.
I had no idea what was happening in the kitchen.
Really, how was I supposed to know? I
was 8 years old and had yet to grow a brain big enough to pay
attention. What happened you asked? I had unwittingly
burned the most prized dish in our household.
Soup.
My mother, upon returning to the kitchen, was
the first to find the source of the smoke drifting faintly through
the air. Scraping the blackened dry and crusty noodles from
the bottom of the pot, my mom gave me (and my siblings) an earful
on how I should listen more to what she says rather than playing
video games."
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6)
"It was a nice day out, especially to be by our swimming
pool. So one day I decided to follow my cousin and brother on my
tricycle circling the pool. Paul my cousin was on a 2-wheeler, and
my brother Cord was on a tricycle as well. We had been circling
the pool for quite a while and to my surprise I was in the deep
end, of the pool, tricycle and all. As I was slowly sinking into
the pool my dad had jumped in and grabbed me. He carefully set me
onto the pavement and got a towel to dry off. I sat there and stared
at my yellow tricycle laying at the bottom of the pool, ten feet
below me."
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7)
" As a writer, you know what you want to write about. But,
even the best writers have problems spelling sometimes. With me,
it's the little words that screw me up.
One day, during summer vacation, I was lying on
my bed, writing a new adventure story. The first five pages
were great, until that one stupid word screwed me up.
"How do you spell murder?" I asked my
sister, of course, she was on the floor, reading a book and listening
to music.
"M.u.r.d.e.r. idiot." I heard a voice
mutter.
"Thanks." I muttered back as I fixed
my spelling. Now, spelling was never one of my stronger subjects,
but that was sad. After I thanked the voice, my sister looked
at me like i was crazy.
"Who are you talking to?"
"Didn't you just answer me?"
"No."
"Oh, great, that little voice in
my head is talking to me again."
"I thought that you weren't supposed to listen to
them."
"Well, this one has spell check. I got the final
remark. It's still bad because I still listen to that voice (or
sometimes the more than one), and sometimes it has good advice.
Others, not so much."
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8)
"It was the end of one of marching band shows, and we were
marching off the field. The drum line was playing our cadence,
and all of a sudden my stick breaks. Everybody in the stands
was laughing at me, it was so embarassing."
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9)
" Basketball and baseball at the same time, wow is that tough.
I went to this basketball camp which ended an hour before my baseball
game. I got every thing put together for baseball, and wore my
basketball stuff straight there. After my basketball camp, I hustled
in the locker room and got changed. I headed over to the baseball
game, catching a ride from my friends (My dad being the coach,
he was already there).
When I got there I was so shocked, and mad at myself.
The team's socks were orange and mine were black! I stuck out
like a sore thumb. My dad wasn't too happy to see the coach's
son not have his whole uniform. Let's just say I didn't
play too well either. The sock screw-up started a chain
reaction of other screw-ups. And there went my ride home, because
my dad didn't want to ride with me."
Gaye
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10)
"It was a very boring weekend and all I had to do was sit
on the computer or watch TV. So I did was any is year old would
do and called some friends. But I instead turned out being invited
to a friends bonfire. At first we where playing basketball, but
then switched to watching TV., then to starting the bonfire. It
all started out when it was just Evan, David and I at the fire
because everyone else where being weenies. Well we where bored
so Evan threw a shooken unopened pop into the fire. Well we forgot
about it and about 5 minutes later it literally torpedoed right
at my face.
Luckily I had a pole in my hand to hit it right out of
its trajectory path. Well when It got dark and the girls left
we had nothing to do again so me and 6 other guys decided to keep
throwing pops in. we never got a big explosion so we decided to
get something bigger. We decided a big can of highly pressurized/flammable
TAG would work. So we threw it in and all ran. Well there was
a few crackles and nothing big so we where all disappointed.Well
we just sat there talking for a little bit but still weren’t
real close to the fire.
Well as we got closer a friend went to it and poked the
fire with the stick. “So much for that Idea right??”
WRONG!!! As he started to walk away BOOOMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!! is
all we could hear while seeing I giant ball of cloud and fire
and ashes forming a mushroom cloud. It blew my friend right on
his butt and all of us on the ground.
But Evan and I just started crying of laughter on the
ground, because despite being scary it was the funniest thing
in the world. I even slapped him in the face I was laughing so
hard! When we all recuperated we noticed neighbors lookin out
their windows and all the back yard lights on. So we put out the
fire as quickly as possible and decided it was the stupidest thing
we could do EVER!!!
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